I’m beginning to remember why one year ago I was thinking it might not be so bad not to live in Paris anymore. La chair est triste. (Flesh is sad.)

Bordel, pourquoi je m’y prends au dernier moment ? C’est incroyable que je ne connaisse personne qui ait Canal+ Cinéma et qui n’ait pas besoin de dormir, cette nuit, au moment de la dernière diffusion des épisodes de Desperate Housewives de cette semaine !

Ah, I knew I’d forgotten something: I wanted to blog my Saturday night (fever). Too late. Pity.

It started something like this: If I had known that when I got 29 I’d begin…

How can I keep myself from mentally arranging and rearranging the cheap little flat I’m going to visit on Wednesday? Fifteen square meters near Bastille, perfect (well, what would be perfect would be a 70 sq. m. on the rue de Rivoli, but I’m on a kind of budget here); available in December, works for me (leaves me just enough time to finish my new contract without having to worry about DSL being installed — plus, moving in after I’ve been paid); second floor… and even a bathtub. It has to be a horror, or they just won’t want me, so what am I to do now to keep it out of my mind for four days? So cruel.

We live in a terrible world where it’s exceptional to enter a shop where everyone is nice, smiling, amicable and efficient. Particularly for a computing store. In Paris.

So, there it goes: Garoo recommends MacWay’s Paris shop. For when you need something Mac. In Paris.

I made three pictures, but it looks like my cameraphone only wants to send one per message. I foolishly thought that, if the button still said “Add”, that meant I could send additional pictures.

I never really knew whether Ed was a boy or a girl (I missed a few episodes, and don’t remember everything I saw) but I think the ambiguity was intended, so whatever his/her real gender I’m not really breaking my naming convention (female fictional characters), even though Ed stands for Edward.

As I arrived at the shop, I remembered I intended to buy a Macally keyboard for Dalloway, and what better moment than before I spend ten days in Paris with a new Mac mini? (Assuming the package includes a VGA adapter like their website says — Fabrice has a pretty LCD screen… with a VGA plug.)

— And… do you have Macally keyboards?

— Yeah, but you won’t have the shortcut keys on it.

— Uh… (What the hell?) Well, they’re Mac keyboards, aren’t they?

— No, it’s standard. You won’t have the Eject or volume keys… and it’s more expensive.

— (Well, yeah, it’s more expensive because it’s designed for Mac and it’s better and that’s why I want one for my iMac) Anyway it’s just F14 F15 F16 so there has to be…

— Uh, no.

— (Riiight…) There’s no way I could take a look at one?

— No.

— (Wow, they do want to sell, here.) A picture?

— Ah… yes… (It takes him far too long to find the product page on their site.) There. (The pictures is twelve by five pixels.)

—Mfff rff gnnn… (I can’t see a Zoom button, and if it’s hidden it’s not up to me to beg for it.) Yeah well okay I’ll see, I’ll manage.

— And, you see, it’s more expensive, the Apple keyboard is only twenty euros.

— (Goddamnit, you really don’t want to push your sales.)

— You’ll take the Apple keyboard?

— (Arghhh!)

And the worst part is, he wasn’t being an asshole — he was smiling, rather cute… only he has no idea what he’s selling. On the Macally website, of course: “CD Eject and volume control buttons.”

^* The DVI/VGA is not only in the box, it’s also listed on the Apple store for the latest revision. It’s odd, I was so sure it was, or had become, optional.

Un Mac mini à 357 €.

Arg. Arg. Arg. Must resist, this isn’t the time. Or is it? I was talking about setting a mini with two Firewire drives (one for data, one for daily backup) as a fileserver and iTunes server on my home network; when and where am I going to find such an offer again? I spent almost as much on my old G3 clamshell, that I only used for a couple months.

Now, I know there’s the upcoming mini revision, but it won’t be quite spectacular; more importantly, the offer involves the very first model, with only 256MB RAM. So the question is: can it be enough to only run iTunes and filesharing? I’d think it is.

(Well, there’s the other question: is it quite reasonable to buy a mini now, when I’m looking for a flat in Paris? But I might very well not find one, and anyway I don’t think I’ll move unless I get the 5000€ contract I should have soon. Oh, and every space saver counts when you move into a Paris flat.)

P.S. And there’s got to be someone who can lend me for a week, or even sell me for 10€, a wired keyboard and mouse?

Self-fulfilling prophecy: I’ll never find a flat in Paris. There’s a reason it’s been called the Garoo Farewell Tour.

Il n’y aurait pas une colocation qui se libère, là, dans les semaines ou mois qui viennent, non ?

It’s good to be home! Uh, wait… no, not yet. Anyhoo, here I am, back in Paris (this time I didn’t want to announce it before I was there), so the neverending flow of dinner invitations may now resume. Or not. Not neverending, I mean. Nor a flow at all, anyway.

So I’m here now for two wee… uh, I should be here for two weeks, barring any change of plans there could be and always eventually is, and my schedule is pretty blank right now so you might want to try and take a shot at it, if you’re brave and have enough self-esteem to handle rejection. One may be able to see me at Apple Expo, and probably not at the bloggers’ picnic this Sunday. And the rest of my evenings are available.

Oh, and now that I saw the first five Desperate Housewives episodes, I absolutely need to find a way to watch the next four as they go on Canal+.

I had forgotten that summer had an end.

Hurray, I can wear again the M-sized t-shirts I bought two years ago — one can just hardly tell there’s a little bump down my belly. (Of course, once in Paris, in front of Fabrice’s high-resolution mirror, I’ll probably think I’m obese.)

Don’t rush and buy tickets for the next two weeks in Paris; it looks like I might have underestimated Murphy’s Law again. (What possessed me to announce my upcoming return as a fact?)

— Ca donne quoi 8 ans plus tard ? :)

— Huit ans ?!… Oh putain

— :)

— Oh putain oh putain oh putain

Attention, attention, change of plans! If you’d booked seats for the first Paris week of the Garoo Farewell Tour, the even has been postponed to the next week. Garoo is currently going back to his roots in Smallville (read: he’s been there for ninety minutes now and wants to run and run away, despite the shiny iMac 20” smiling to him) and will get back to Paris next week-end, for two final weeks of entertainment.

But then, it’s not like we sold too many tickets already, so it won’t change many people’s plans. Keep it going that way and the staff will just cancel the whole tour. (Well, no, they can’t, because I left half my luggage in Paris to make sure I couldn’t chicken out of going back.)

Wow, fucking flashback.

So I should be expected to write about being in Paris since Wednesday and today being Saturday already and stuff being bound to have happened and whatever.

But for a while now you’ve gotten used to me not telling you anything — and those readers who liked it when I wrote about my life (what little I did) have likely realized I just wouldn’t anymore, and have stopped reading this blog.

So… nothing.

I’m admin-less on a Windows Server, so I can’t install anything, and there’s no mail client (well, I don’t count Outlook Express); could anyone recommend me a mail client or POP checker that can work directly from its zip?

P.S. Oh, I forgot there’s a webmail cgi on the server. I had never really used it.

This Paris holiday is starting on the wrong note: I was much prettier (and thinner) in Matt’s bathroom mirror. And, of course, the competition was by far easier in Bordeaux. But I can’t just pack up again and leave… I’ve got too much luggage, I must absolutely make it worth having traveled across France and half of Paris with three tons under each arm.

Bien arrivé à Paris — stop — Merci Fabrice pour le très joli appart (pas de lien, il n’a pas de blog, ouh ouh ouh) — stop — Il est absolument, définitivement hors de question que je refasse le trajet inverse jusqu’à Montparnasse seul avec tous mes bagages — stop — Je prends une douche et je sors, les couche-tard qui ont mon numéro peuvent me proposer de prendre un verre.

Garoo sera dans le TGV 8568 qui partira de Bordeaux à 18h27 et arrivera à Montparnasse à 21h25. Sauf si le train a un problème, ou si les tramways bordelais sont en panne, ou si j’annule le billet pour une raison ou une autre (si ça se trouve, Bordeaux a décidé que je ne partirais jamais, définitivement).

Que mes porteurs se réfèrent au tableau “Arrivées” de la gare pour venir chercher mes bagages sur le quai, à la sortie de la voiture 15.

I feel like buying a PSP, for not reason. I’m not worried, that’ll pass.

I know, I knew, I’ll know you can’t ask your readers anything, but I’m still going to have an open call — only an easier one this time. Accomodation has finally been arranged, to the Garoo Farewell Tour team has been able to add a few Paris dates. The number of nights is still undefined — between three and thirty, depending how long the artist’s depression can be made to wait (which means it’s unlikely to last a whole month).

So accomodation has been arranged, and all I’m needing now is:

• people to have drinks with (but not just anybody, I’m not that desperate)

• people to have sex with (and not just anybody either, now that I’ve lost a few pounds in Bordeaux)

• people to let me watch the first Desperate Housewives episodes (and possibly other shows whose existence I have forgotten over the holidays)

• a wifi-equipped Mac (I can’t imagine living another month with a PC, and without my files, mp3s, passwords and whatnot)

• must be all, but I feel like I’m forgetting something, so I might add to the list later

Remember that attending the Garoo Farewell Tour 2005 might (or might not) be a lifetime’s opportunity you don’t (or do) want to miss.

Cocoa pasta with cream — it’s called “crème anglaise” (English cream) in French so I’ve got no idea how to translate it.

P.S. Thanks to rhino75 for contributing — it’s custard.

Exceptional offer, one time only: you can have a sneak peek at my pictures just as they came out of the camera, before I have the opportunity to heavily edit them, on my Flickr account (it’s about time I found a use for it).

I want to replace my Linux fileserver with a Mac mini and two mirrored Firewire disks. But would that be quite reasonable?