That’s me, going shopping the day before the sales begin. Well, it’s not just me, since I wasn’t alone in the stores, but I never said I was the only dork in Paris. So, how could I make it right? Well, obviously, by going shopping again today!

When I went out yesterday, I was desperately wanting to change my style. Fed up with the leather jacket (with a torn pocket, because I always tear up that part of my jackets) and, more importantly, fed up with tight trousers. I’ve always preferred large, wide trousers, and always bought them tight. Really. Go figure. Fifteen years ago, I had one pair of large jeans, but never wore them, because, well, I don’t know, I kind of felt ridiculous or something or whatever. And then, today, I realized the sales were beginning. Sales are magical: I can buy baggy pants and a jacket that fits them, change everything in the same day, and not end up ruined. Not entirely ruined, at least. Afterwards, all I’ll need will be skater shoes, bleached hair and a face piercing, and then I’ll be ready. For nothing.

No sooner said than done. I mean, the clothes, because I think I’m gonna wait a little more for the piercing, tatoo, scars and all. There we go for an afternoon at the mall. Huh… does everybody take a day off for the sales? And I thought I would take advantage of my slacker’s timetable to enjoy empty stores. No way, the cheaper stores were packed with customers. Ok, excuse-me, it’s my first time here, never been to sales before.

A new jacket, that should fit whatever trousers I choose to wear, even though I expected it grey and it’s green, well, slightly hued but plain enough: 35 €, ka-ching! And I should have bought new gloves too, because violet-grey with green-grey looks awkward. Two wide pairs of trousers: 35 €, ka-ching! Two boxer shorts, because I like boxer shorts and because I’m planning on becoming an underwear model after a couple of decades working out: 15 €, ka-ching! And I still haven’t found the backpack I want—but that’s not an issue anymore, considering the number of pockets my new jacket has. I’ll always find a place to put the digital camera (when it has a working battery, and a larger MemoryStick).

After a nice day of shopping, here I am, poorer than before, but less out of date than I was. Well, I don’t know actually: nobody’s seen me in real life yet (or in unreal life either) with those clothes, so maybe I’m getting ahead of myself here. And I think my jacket’s too large. And it’s cold out there. And I wish I had some money on my bank account. And, uh, well, we’ll see.

Oh, and why did I answer no, when the salesman asked me if I wanted to keep the hanger with my jacket? We’re all out of hangers here…